


Ignorance is...?

by PineconeTrinklebriar



Series: Nightlights [11]
Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Horrorfell (Undertale), Animal Shelter Volunteering, Dogs, Established Relationship, Everything turns out okay eventually promise, F/M, Horrorfell Papyrus - Freeform, Horrorfell Sans - Freeform, Horrortale Papyrus (Undertale), Horrortale Sans (Undertale), Hospitalization, M/M, Major Character Injury, Major Illness, Soul Bond, Swapfell Papyrus (Undertale), Swapfell Sans (Undertale), Underfell Papyrus (Undertale), Underfell Sans (Undertale), soul injury
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-03-06
Updated: 2021-03-13
Packaged: 2021-03-19 11:09:26
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 12,020
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29873757
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PineconeTrinklebriar/pseuds/PineconeTrinklebriar
Summary: A lot of people are ignorant of a lot of things: your soul injury, feelings, things done to survive, lines crossed to keep others alive... and how life can go from perfectly ordinary to completely devastated in a matter of hours. Ignorance may be bliss, but all of those secrets catch up eventually.
Relationships: Papyrus/Papyrus (Undertale), Sans (Undertale)/Reader
Series: Nightlights [11]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1994629
Comments: 5
Kudos: 12





	1. ... confidence.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm all about building the dread, but I do want to remind you that everything does eventually turn out okay with everyone in Nightlights! It may be a (really hard and traumatizing) journey, but they will be alive and together in the end. :)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Confidence is ignorance. If you are feeling cocky, it's because you don't know something."  
> -Eoin Colfer
> 
> A perfectly ordinary breakfast and lunch.

“Ellie!”

You groaned and rolled away from the source of the sound. “Sleeping,” you muttered.

“Come on, Ella, it’s the big day. HorrorFells’re already in the kitchen an’ Sans is in the shower.”

Some of that filtered into your sleepy brain. Seemed important, the part about Sans being in the shower, but your brain refused to do anything with that information. “‘e’s a big boy. ‘E can take care of ‘imself in the shower,” you mumbled.

“An’ now I have to ritually drive an ice pick into my auditory ossicle. Get! Up!” 

With those last two words, the blanks were yanked off of you. You screeched and popped up a little shield around yourself while your brain caught up with this heinous attack. You sat up and looked around, probably a little frantic and wild-eyed. Mutt was next to you, Sans’s sensible comforter in his claws, wearing ratty pajamas. “Mutt!” you hissed. “What if I’d been naked?!”

He waved you off. “Ya never sleep naked.”

You narrowed your eyes at him. “It weirds me out that you know that.”

“Ya know the house evac plans as well as I do. There’s like 10 scenarios an’ in a bunch of ‘em I grab ya outa bed and take off with ya.”

Yeah, he was right. As you woke up more, you remembered Sans going over the house evacuation plans with you when you first began sleeping over. There was also a yearly review of said plans and an update to the plans when Neo and Hobbes moved in. You scrubbed a hand down your face. Gods, you were tired. 

The thing was, you really shouldn’t be. Yesterday, you visited Alphys’s lab, summoned by an excited text from the lizard. She spent the last few weeks with the magic-dampening cuff from your dryad rescue mission, trying to find a way to create a weaker version that you would also be able to remove at will. Turns out, it was a lot more difficult than either of you thought it would be. Apparently, the cuff was made with a dark alliumagic (made sense) and recreating it was very difficult for a monster who couldn’t sense the alliumagic to begin with. You aided her as much as you could between missions, but you weren’t really much help. 

Yesterday, though, she cracked the code. When you arrived in the lab, she showed you a simple pewter ring, thin and delicate, that you could wear on your thumb. She excitedly explained that you could put it on and take it off at will and it would reduce your magic, but not completely wipe it out. “Y-you’ll still be able to do s-s-some magic with it on,” she told you, “but it will be very m-mild.” You were both hopeful that it would reduce your symptoms and she didn’t expect any negative side effects as long as you took the ring off both slowly and before trying to summon magic so that your system didn’t overflow with magic. You slept with the ring on that night and it was the first night in a long while that you didn’t have any nightmares. Your soul didn’t hurt, not really. It was down to a manageable ache that let you sleep straight through the night. It was weird that you were so tired; you probably needed to slip into the bathroom and check your soul over before you left for the day. With your luck, you were still slowly bleeding magic even with the ring. You needed an easy day with a little more sleep. What were you even doing...?

Your brain sparked when you remembered what day it was. You were supposed to volunteer at the dog shelter with Anne and Jupiter for the first time! That was why Mutt was waking you up; last night, the four of you agreed to make breakfast for Sans before he went to work. He was back full time, although he was still supposed to take frequent breaks and had to wear special glasses. Neo modified them for him so that they looked less like Mr. Magoo and more like a hot nerd. He even did some sort of magic to them so that he didn’t have to tape them to his skull like a dork. It was a miracle.

It was also a miracle how sexy he looked in them.

You didn’t have time for that particular train of thought. You bolted out of bed, Mutt dodging out of your way seamlessly like he expected you to suddenly wake up and remember you were supposed to make breakfast. He knew you too well. You dashed to the closet and snagged Sans’s robe (the new one you got him for Gyftmas, not the one you’d worn that night that Hobbes--) and grabbed onto Mutt. “To the kitchen, Mutthew!” you said.

He snorted and you were standing in the kitchen. Hobbes sat primly at the table fiddling with a Rubix cube and Neo had a stack of pancakes taller than you by the stove. “Mornin’,” you said happily. “Thanks for cooking, Neo.”

“No problem-o,” he said happily. “E’rybody’s got a big day today.”

You knew what you and Sans were each doing today, but, “What’re you guys up to today?” you asked.

Hobbes brightened and signed at you excitedly. You were getting better at speaking hands, so you got the gist of it. “The zoo?” you asked. 

Hobbes nodded. “We’re going to see a real tiger and then go to the bookstore! Andy said he’d help us find more Calvin and Hobbes books!”

“That’s awesome!” you signed back. 

“Mutt and Mars are taking us!” You couldn’t help but grin at that. Mutt and Mars were huge fans of visiting the zoo themselves; Mutt used to spend entire Saturdays sitting in front of the penguin exhibit drawing and reading. Now that Mars was also into art, he took to joining Mutt there, though he preferred the bat section. On Saturdays that you didn’t have anything else to do, you often went with them. You and Mutt had a running penguin soap opera that you narrated to each other and Mars somehow charmed the zookeepers at the bat exhibit into letting him help out from time to time. Once, you found him sitting on the floor of the exhibit petting a baby bat that fell off the ceiling. You don’t want to say it was the cutest thing you’d ever seen, but it was your contact picture for him in your phone. Even though they’d been doing it for a while now, you still routinely got pictures of the bats and the penguins, particularly updates about the two main penguin stars of your soap opera. 

“I wish I could come!” you signed. That about exhausted your Hands vocabulary, so you finished out loud, “If I didn’t already have plans at the shelter today, I would definitely tag along!”

“Tag along where, love? And why are you all awake so early?” Sans breezed into the kitchen carrying his briefcase and wearing a suit. You were still getting used to him in a suit again and you could admit that he looked really good. Plus, he had the miracle glasses on, damn baby. You slid over and let him pull you into a hug/kiss combo.

“Zoo,” Mutt said.

“Ah. Yes, today is your first day at the shelter, is it not?” Sans accepted the cup of coffee that Mutt slid him and sat across from Hobbes at the table. You and Mutt sat down as well.

“Yup! Anne and I are picking up Jup at 11, getting lunch, and then spending the rest of the day chilling with dogs.”

“That reminds me,” he said. He bustled out of the kitchen before returning with a huge storage tub that he plopped beside you. “These are some things that I picked up for Rosie. Will you take them with you, please?”

Oh, be still your soul. You peeked into the crate and squealed at all the stuff. It was like he bought an entire pet store! There were tennis balls and frisbees and plushies, along with a variety of treats and bones. You retrieved a platypus plushie and held it up to him. “When did you do all of this?”

“I very recently didn’t go to work for an entire week. I had plenty of time to purchase some bobbles for the animal.”

“This is more than ‘some bobbles’,” you pointed out.

“‘Bobbles’?” Mutt asked. “You’re a nerd.”

“Pancakes!” Neo interrupted. He slid the plate onto the table and parceled the food out to each of you before he slipped into his own seat. “Made ‘em with peanut butter so we’d all ‘ave extra protein today,” he said.

“It smells amazing,” you told him. “Thank you, Neo.” Then you refocused on Sans. “And thank you for getting stuff for Rosie; I’m sure she’ll love it.”

They both blushed. Neo played with the food on his plate for a minute before saying, “‘S no problem. Like cookin’.”

“Yes! Well! I put another container in the back of your Jeep already for the children,” Sans told you. “I did not want them to feel neglected because I purchased items for another furry child and not for them.”

You grinned at him. “You are a fantastic fur father,” you told him.

“Fur-ther,” Sans corrected.

“Fur-ther,” you agreed happily.

“Hey, all three o’ their fur uncles helped out,” Mutt said. “We all went wit’ ‘im to pick the stuff.”

“You guys did?” you asked happily. The three of them nodded like bobbleheads. “Oh, that’s awesome! I will be sure to tell the children! We’ll have to schedule a time for you all to come over and see them play with their stuff!”

Hobbes nodded happily and Neo chuckled. “Never been a’nucle ‘fore,” he said. “Willin’ ta give it a shot.”

You beamed at him. The rest of breakfast was pretty calm; everyone ate and talked about nothing until it was time for Sans to dash out the door with a travel mug of coffee. He pulled you into a kiss, promised to take his scheduled breaks, promised not to remove his glasses… And then he was out the door to ride to work with Edge.

It was a perfectly ordinary morning, filled with perfectly ordinary interactions among you. None of you--not even Hobbes--knew that there were only a few hours between your little family and tragedy. There wouldn’t be another perfectly normal meal at that table, not for a long while.

But none of you knew that yet. You each said goodbye to one another and dashed your separate ways, expecting everyone to return safe and sound for dinner. 

***

Jupiter was nothing if not enthusiastic, as usual. When you and Anne pulled into the Horrortale brothers’ driveway, he threw open the door with such force that it bounced off the wall. You winced, remembering the dollar amount that Stretch estimated that the skeleton family spent on doors each year.

You were immediately distracted from your concerns by the fact that he was wearing a button-up with cartoon dogs printed all over it. His bow tie had cats on it and he had a pair of neon pink sunglasses taped to his head. “He is the coolest skeleton in this family,” you said.

“For real though,” Anne agreed. She was already scrambling out so he could have shotgun.

“Hello, friends Anne and Ellie! Friend Anne, do you need something? Perhaps a hug of friendship? Or a snack?”

She laughed. “I mean, you can have a hug of friendship, but I was actually just moving to the back so you could have shotgun.”

Jupiter hugged her tightly then said, “I do not mind sitting in the back! All of the human films say that ladies should be allowed to sit in the front seat!”

“But your legs are like five times as long as mine,” Anne pointed out.

“Length of legs has no bearing on chivalry, my friend!”

Anne smothered another laugh and said, “Fine. If you’re sure.”

“If you’re going to sit in the back, you get to pick where we’re eating lunch,” you told him as he origami-ed himself into the Jeep. Luckily it was a pretty mild day so you left the top off, giving Jupiter more room to work with. He ended up turning sideways and sort of folding his legs up like a very enthusiastic praying mantis. “Well, you know I have many opinions about food!” he quipped once he was settled.

The three of you ended up at a little soup and salad joint close to the university’s campus. “I love this place!” Anne burbled as the three of you went in.

“Yes! I remember!”

“You remember?”

Jupiter paused to open the door for the two of you. “Of course! Our study group came here freshman year and you said that this was your favorite place to eat, that the food was ‘the closest to magical you can get without actually involving magic.’”

“That does sound like you,” you said helpfully.

“Oh. I’m sorry I don’t remember that, Jupiter,” she said awkwardly.

He waved that off. “The great Papyrus often remembers things that others forget! My mind is like a sticky trap, like the kind that flies get stuck in, except instead of flies it captures interesting memories. Anyway, let’s get some soup and sandwiches of friendship!”

Booths were a little much to ask of Jupiter’s legs, so the three of you ended up at a table outside enjoying the unseasonably warm weather and company. It was relaxing to sit back and listen to Anne and Jupiter swap hilarious stories about people in their cohort, reminiscing about their years together in nursing school. Apparently there was a dude that insisted everyone call him Taco, which is both hilarious and sort of disturbing? From a medical point of view? 

“I saw him in the cafeteria at the hospital last week and his nametag said Taco on it!” Jupiter said in a voice that said he knew he had all the hot goss. 

“No! How did he get them to agree to that? I can’t get the center to put anything except my full name on my nametag! I swear, I haven’t been called Annebethe since my grandmother moved to Rio, but now everyone there thinks that’s my preferred name.”

Jupiter cocked his head to the side. “It is a very pretty name!”

Anne actually blushed a little before stabbing a rogue tomato in her salad. “Thanks. It’s, uh, a family name.”

“I wouldn’t know about that! Sans doesn’t remember where we got our names. I guess they could be family names, but we don’t know. Why do you not want to be called your pretty name?” Jupiter blanched and quickly amended, “Not! That the name Anne isn’t pretty!”

“It’s fine,” she said. “It’s kind of silly now, actually. We went to school with a kid who used to make fun of it.”

The memory washed over you. You’d nearly forgotten. When you were just a little mageling, back when Anne still went by Annebethe and your parents were still alive, there was a school bully. She was mean to everyone but latched onto you and Anne particularly. You didn’t know why. One day, she cornered Anne and tore at her dress with her magic, calling her names until she cried. You tried to help, but your magic wasn’t developed enough to do much. You ended up in the mud, yelling at the girl to stop.

Oliver was the one who stepped in. He was brave; a little knight in shining armor. He got between Annebethe and the girl, even went so far as to take a hit for her. He ended up with a black eye and the girl had to study at home for a while as a punishment. Anne stopped going by Annebethe, but the two of you adopted Oliver into your friend group immediately. It wasn’t until you got older that Anne began to be uncomfortable with him, sensing the corruption happening to his soul. Back then, he was the handsome, brave kid that put himself in the line of fire to protect your best friend. Not…

“Well, that is just terrible! I’m sure that child had some crippling self-esteem issues that they were taking out on you and your pretty name!”

Anne laughed. “Maybe. Her name was Thomasin which is, admittedly, not great.”

“Not great,” Jupiter agreed. “I always liked the name Pickles.”

You couldn’t help but laugh at that declaration and Jupiter looked pleased with himself. “Well, who knows, maybe the shelter will have a Pickles,” you said. “Speaking of, we should get going.”

(You had no way of knowing that you were steadily moving closer to fate smashing your fragile calm with a hammer, that in less than two hours everything would be different.)

The three of you cleaned up, paused long enough for Jupiter to ask a lady at a nearby table how she made the scarf she was wearing, and then you all made your way to the shelter. Jupiter gamely carried in the huge crate for you and you were greeted by Joe, the human shelter worker that you met when you brought Rosie in.

“Hey! There are my favorite mages!” he said happily. “And a new friend! What’s up, dude?”

“This is Jupiter,” Anne said. “He went through the nursing program with me!”

“It is a pleasure to meet you! You have a lovely home for dogs in need of friends!” Jupiter said. He held out the crate. “Black sent this for your charges. Well, I think he was specifically thinking of Rosie, but I’m sure any dog will enjoy the stuff and I do not think Black would mind if it were shared!”

“Oh coolio, another of Sans’s crates!” Joe took it from Jupiter and began poking through it. “Oh, good! He sent some of the softer treats.”

“Another of Sans’s crates?” you asked.

“Huh? Yeah, he drops one off like every other day since Rosie came in. He found out she couldn’t eat the hard treats ‘cause of her teeth, so looks like he switched to the softer brand.”

Welp, you just fell more in love with your boyfriend again.

“Her teeth?” Jupiter asked.

“Yeah. Poor girl’s just got some old teeth. Nothing too bad, but we had to do some dental work on her. She just needs softer stuff now is all.”

You didn’t miss how Jupiter ghosted a hand along his own teeth in thought. Once Joe was finished pawing through the box, he straightened back up and flashed a huge grin at you. “So, you guys wanna take some dogs on some walks? It’s a beautiful day out and we don’t have enough workers to get ‘em all out.”

“Yes!” Jupiter yelled, accompanied by an adorable little fist pump. “Can we meet Rosie?”

“For sure. She can hang out with us the whole time if you want. She’s a really good girl.”

“Well of course she is! She is a member of the skeleton family!”

Joe seemed taken aback by that but recovered quickly. “Cool, cool, cool. Let’s go walk some doggos.” He led you back to the kennel that you left Rosie in a couple of weeks ago. She was still in there, but now she was curled up on the fluffiest dog bed you’d ever seen with an equally fluffy blanket pulled up around her. She looked up at you from her little nap nook as you approached. When she saw that it was Joe, she stood up slowly like her joints were stiff and stretched out. You couldn’t help but squeal when you saw that she was wearing a pink and gray sweater with little hearts on it.

Joe laughed. “Hi there pretty girl. You wanna meet a new pal?” She wagged her tail in response.

“What a unique fur pattern!” Jupiter said happily. You weren’t sure if he was kidding or not, but you decided to let it go for now. Joe opened the kennel door and she shuffled out, immediately flopping onto her back for belly rubs.

“Wowie,” Jupiter said softly. He knelt down and gently pet her tummy and her tail thumped on the ground.

Apparently she had a harness on under the sweater because Joe hooked a leash to it. Rosie looked up at him like she was deciding whether or not it was worth it to get up and he chuckled. “Come on, princess. I’ll get you some treats up front, yeah?”

At that, she lumbered back to her feet and Joe handed the leash to Jupiter. “I’ll grab a couple more dogs for the rest of us and we’ll get going, okay?” You shot him a thumbs up and waited while he retrieved a little floof of a puppy for Anne and a golden retriever for you. He got a spotted dog with long fur for himself before leading the way back up front. 

“We have a really great dog park just down the street,” he explained as he handed out treats. “What I’d like to do is take these guys, leave someone with them, and come back for the rest of their playgroup. After they play for a bit, we can switch them out with another group. Does that work for you?”

“That sounds cute beyond words,” you told him.

“Believe me, it totally is.” He grabbed a large tote bag filled with Dog Stuff and led you out the door.

Your merry crew made your way the few blocks down the road to the dog park. There were a few other people playing with their dogs, but the park was still muddy from the snow you got a week earlier. As soon as you were safely within the fence, you unleashed the dogs. Rosie curled up beside you and ~~insisted that~~ let Jupiter pet her. The others took off immediately, chasing tennis balls that Joe and Anne threw for them. You sat down beside Rosie to pet her. She shifted herself so that you had a better angle on her belly.

“Alright, these beauties are settled. Who wants to head back for more?” Joe asked, clapping his hands together enthusiastically.

“I will,” Anne said.

“I will, too!” Jupiter exclaimed.

“I guess I’m on puppy park guard duty,” you said.

“Are you okay with that?” Anne asked.

“Yup, definitely. They don’t have thumbs so it’s not like they can escape,” you told her.

“That settles it then! Come along, friend Annebethe!” Jupiter extended his arm to her and she ~~giggled~~ laughed and took it.

“Thank you, good sir,” she said.

“You are, of course, welcome!” He glanced over at Joe and offered his other arm. “New Friend Joe?”

Joe gave him an amused look but said, “Hells to the yes, we are definitely going to Wizard of Oz our way back to the shelter!” He grabbed Jupiter’s arm and the three of them skipped out of the park at Joe’s insistence. You laughed and went back to watching the dogs.

It was peaceful. For the first time in a long time, your soul didn’t hurt. You smiled and lazily rubbed Rosie’s belly, blissfully unaware that you were only twenty minutes away from the fate dangling over your head. 


	2. ... to live.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The hammer drops.
> 
> “How could I have been so ignorant? she thinks. So stupid, so unseeing, so given over to carelessness. But without such ignorance, such carelessness, how could we live? If you knew what was going to happen, if you knew everything that was going to happen next—if you knew in advance the consequences of your own actions—you'd be doomed. You'd be as ruined as God. You'd be a stone. You'd never eat or drink or laugh or get out of bed in the morning. You'd never love anyone, ever again. You'd never dare to.”   
> ― Margaret Atwood, The Blind Assassin

Hobbes liked it best when they drove in a car. Sans explained how useful the… shortcuts(?)... were, that they kept everyone alive, but they made his skull throb and his nonexistent stomach rolled every time. 

He had enough trouble knowing where he was without the help of space/time shenanigans.

Today, Dark Him borrowed the car so they could all go… somewhere. Hobbes didn’t remember, not really, but Sans looked happy and Big Sans’s single eye light was calm and relaxed. Wherever they were going, it was safe enough. He had his puzzle cube and his brother was happy. That was enough for him.

If he asked questions, it would remind Sans how broken he was.

Instead, he decided to work on making a superb puzzle to show Dark Brother when they got home. Black. His name was Black.

Didn’t matter.

The car pulled into a driveway that Hobbes slightly recognized. He looked around and tried to place it; it was a lot easier when the door of the house opened and the happy version of him bustled out. Hobbes hated him. He was tall and smiley and perfect. He never had to do terrible things to stay alive. He never let his brother sacrifice everything for him. 

He was also too tall for the backseat, but so was Hobbes and he was in the back. Sans slid over to make room for the large monster, who climbed into the backseat and smiled at all of them. “Thank you for inviting me!” he said brightly. “I love the zoo!”

“No prob, Paps,” Dark Him (... Puppy? Dog? Something dog-related, he was sure) said. "We really don' hang out enough."

The smile on Happy Him's face turned waxy. "Yes, well. I recently acquired far more free time than I had before."

A beat of awkward silence, and damn if Hobbes knew why. Happy Him seemed… unhappy for some reason. What did he even have to be unhappy about? 

The faces of everyone else in the car told him that he probably knew exactly what the problem was and he just couldn't remember, which pissed him right the hell off. He hated not remembering. But he didn't want to worry Sans, so he patted Happy Him's arm with one hand and signed, “There, there,” with the other.

It felt condescending to him, but it seemed to make the other happy. Mission accomplished or what the hell ever. 

"Eh, e'ryone has breakups," Sans said, not unkindly. "'S a part o' life."

"Yes," Happy Him said stiffly. "Normally I would be more than thrilled to discuss any topic you chose, except puns of course, but I would be much happier if we could not discuss this."

"No problem," Dog said. "New topic."

"I listened ta that phone thing ya recommended," Sans said. "The one wit' the two ladies?"

"Oh! Murder Babes?"

"Nah, the other one."

"Wining, Dining, and Criming?"

"Yah!"

Happy Him beamed. "Did you like it?"

Sans made a derisive snorting noise. "'Course I did. How could ya not? Coupla broads sittin' 'round, drinkin' an' talkin' 'bout murder. An' they're smart 'bout it! We didn' have unsolved murders Underground, ya know? Someone's gotta talk 'bout it up here." To Hobbes’s amazement, his brother was telling the truth. He could feel his warm happiness bubbling through the soul connection.

"I agree! And they cover such a variety! I heard they were interested in covering the [name of murdered slime] case! It will be the first monster true crime episode if they do!"

"Wowzers," Sans said, and his smile was real. 

"Wowzers indeed! I asked Sans if they have contacted the Embassy but he refused to find out for me!"

""I can ask my bro," Dog suggested.

"That would be very helpful, Mutty Me! Thank you!"

"What if we wrote 'em a letter an' told 'em we could show 'em 'round?" Sans said. "We could take 'em 'round New New Home, show 'em his house, an' even set up interviews wit' folks who knew 'im."

"That is a wonderful idea, Neo!"

"Come over after the zoo an' write it," Mutty(?) said. "Ya can stay for dinner."

"I couldn't impose like that."

"You kiddin'? My bro'd love someone else to fuss over."

Happy Him paused to think before nodding. "Very well! That sounds like a wonderful distraction from the crushing loneliness of my home!"

Hobbes had a moment of grudging respect for his alternate. That stark honesty, despite the fact that it clearly made everyone around him feel awkward, was something to be admired. It didn't hurt that he was apparently lonely for some reason.

Hobbes could relate.

The rest of the drive to wherever was spent fiddling with his puzzle cube and half-heartedly listening to the others talk about humans murdering each other in interesting ways. It sounded like the humans monetized the whole affair, which left him with a nostalgic pain for home. He couldn't remember a lot of things, but he did remember that Mettaton used to have the most gloriously gory shows, right up until…

Well. Sans didn’t like to talk about the human that murdered all of their friends. He understood that. Sans  _ should _ be ashamed of him for being so shitty and weak. The captain of the royal guard, bamboozled by a child? 

_ (A group of children, his mind nags. A group of mages and… someone? Someone important. Someone he can't remember. It doesn’t matter.) _

The car pulled into a giant parking lot, one with a huge sign that declared it the Mt. Ebbott Zoo, and just like that, Hobbes remembered the tigers and that they're going to the bookstore after. He remembered breakfast and you managing to speak some Hands to him and the pancakes. Warmth that felt suspiciously like happiness pulsed in his soul. He smiled to himself (well, he would have if he still had a jaw) and climbed out of the car. 

The second his boots touched pavement, he felt it: The Dread. The warmth drained from his soul immediately.  None of the other hims seemed to feel The Dread like he did; they couldn't feel the tendrils of the future creeping around their throats and strangling them. Sans told him that The Dread saved their lives so many times, and he was grateful for that, but he _hated_ it.  He did not usually know why it was happening, just that it meant Something Bad was coming. Sometime later, he would get a small warning, an instant of cold clarity in which to act, and he could only hope that it was enough.

_ It wasn’t always enough. _

Sans spun and looked at him with narrowed sockets. Of course Sans knew he was feeling it; their soul situation meant that Sans always knew what Hobbes was feeling. His brother hustled over and grabbed him by the humerouses. "Know what it is?" he asked.

Hobbes shook his head. Soon he would have a vision of the badness, but right now he had no idea what was wrong, only that something bad was going to happen.

"Wassup?" Mutty asked.

"Nothin'," Sans grunted. "He jus' feels weird sometimes." 

Hobbes didn't look up, not at his brother or Mutty or Happy Him. Some of the skeletons were Judges, he knew, but he couldn't remember which and he didn't want them to know his brother was lying. Their powers were a secret, Sans said. It would keep them safe. So Mutt didn't tell anyone about The Dread or the visions or Sans being able to manipulate time. He just stared at his boots and wondered if they would still get to see the tigers.

An arm wrapped around his shoulder. "Don't worry, Short Me! We will have such a wonderful time that you forget all of your weird feelings!" Before Hobbes could react, Happy Him was guiding him away from the car and towards what he assumed was the entrance to the zoo. He glanced around and saw that Sans and Mutty were following them, so he relaxed and allowed himself to be led. There wasn't much to be done until he had his vision; until then, they may as well try to enjoy the zoo.

***

Ten minutes until the hammer poised to shatter the fragile calm smashed into your life and you lounged on the slightly damp grass, still giving Rosie belly rubs and watching the other three dogs closely. The golden retriever and spotted one seemed happy to chase each other around.

The floofy puppy (Buddy was his name, Joe told you on the walk over) seemed to have made a friend; there was another little guy about his size. The two of them were wrestling around and flinging mud everywhere. You waved to the other dog’s owner, a cute human woman with red hair who was glancing back and forth between her dog and the sketchpad on her knee. She gave you a little wave back and then went back to her work. 

You liked the dog park, you decided. It was peaceful here. Petting Rosie was almost meditative; your usually-loud brain calmed the longer you sat. The buzz of pain and exhaustion faded into the background, along with the constant low-level anxiety that the others would figure out what was going on with your soul and also that they would just give up on you one day. Those thoughts that were often so loud you couldn’t hear yourself think were just… quieter today. 

_ You should tell them. _

You watched the dogs play and thought about how Sans would react. He was going to be pissed, that was a given, but did you really think he would be  _ that _ mad? Would he really hurt Hobbes? Would he really send you away? 

_ Or did you maybe just not want to deal with it and all of that was a convenient excuse? _

Rosie licked at your hand and you yanked it back. She looked up at you with big, loving eyes like she was reminding you of all the crates that Sans sent her. He didn’t even tell you about it; he just did it. How often did he do stuff like that, just take care of everything without anyone even knowing? That was essentially his job at the Embassy, too. He spent all of his time working behind the scenes so that monsters could be safe and happy on the surface. You doubted that most of the monsters in New New Home had any idea what he did for them, but he did it all anyway, never expecting any sort of thanks.

Was he your boyfriend or not? Did you love and trust him or didn’t you? It was time to put your money where your mouth was. Besides, now that you had the ring to treat symptoms, everything felt less fragile. It felt less like you were a bomb that was going to explode.

_ You were tired of being alone, of feeling like you were lying to him. _

You pulled your phone out of your pocket and typed a quick text to Sans-- “Hey, can we go out just us tonight? I wanna talk to you about something! Not a break up, lol!”--but before you could hit send, there was a gasp from your left. You looked up and saw the redhead whose puppy was friends with Buddy. She was sitting right where she had been earlier, still staring straight ahead, but now she was covered in a squelchy layer of mud.  _ Huh. _

You glanced around and realized with horror that a very muddy Buddy was standing in front of her. While you watched, he shook (again), flinging even more mud all over the woman and her sketchbook. 

“Shit!” you said, lunging to your feet. Your phone clattered to the ground, forgotten. “I’m so sorry! Buddy!” 

She looked herself over and sighed. “It’s fine.” She got up and wiped as much of the mud off of herself as she could. “Puppies do that sometimes.”

“Yeah,” you said awkwardly. “Sorry. I don’t know much about them. I’m volunteering at the shelter down the road and this is my first rodeo. Puppy-o? Puppy-o.”

She softened a little at that. “Well, I’d have to be an asshole to be pissed at someone who’s helping at the shelter. It’s really not a big deal.”

You walked her to the gate and continued apologizing profusely as she let herself out and her puppy out. Apparently, the pup’s name was Sprinkles, which was beyond cute. (Yes, you learned the owner’s name, too. It was Kali.) You and Kali paused by the gate to exchange phone numbers. The two puppies seemed to get along so well that she suggested you text her next time you were volunteering at the shelter. 

“Here, do you want to put yours in mine?” she asked, holding out her phone to you.

“Sure!” You grabbed her phone and entered your number, then texted your own phone. You waited for the ding and frowned when you didn’t hear it. You patted yourself down but didn’t find it. “Huh. I don’t know…”

Your musings were cut off when something fluffy bolted past your legs. Stupidly, the two of you left the gate open while you paused to talk and Buddy took advantage of the opportunity. “Shit!” you yelled and chased after him. “Buddy!”

The puppy turned around and barked at you before taking off again. He darted out into the street and you felt your soul drop. _There was a truck coming._

***

The zoo was… fine. Hobbes liked the pingwings and the night birds. He liked best that his brother liked the zoo. Years had passed since Hobbes last saw his older brother genuinely delighted like this, if he ever had.  _ ( ~~He wouldn’t remember it if he had.~~ ) _

There was not much in their universe to delight in. He may not remember everything, but he remembered the fear, the hunger, the anger, the dust. He remembered that Sans gave up everything for him, even if he couldn’t remember exactly what “everything” was. So, to see his brother gesticulating excitedly at the striped horses? Yes, it was... fine.

He didn’t even mind the company of Happy Him. He also seemed to make Sans happy, the two of them laughing along about the human death show that they both liked. Mutty and Big Sans were both quieter, but they weighed in with some frankly horrific puns from time to time. Big Sans even got them all nice cream, which was delightful, even if it made him miss the scream cream that the buns used to sell back home. It was a beautiful day outside.

If only he did not feel The Dread.

They were looking at the fishes when The Dread broke into a crystal clear vision of you lying in the street coughing up magic. Dying. He fed the vision through his soul connection to Sans as fast as thought and, just like that, the zoo was done for the day. Sans knew the place somehow (they’d been there, apparently, but Hobbes didn’t remember it) and Mutt believed him fast. _(Not everyone believed them fast. Hobbes didn’t remember who didn’t, but he knew it hurt to watch them die.)_

Mutt pulled them through that cold, dark place and dumped them onto the road Hobbes saw in his vision. He ignored the sounds of Happy Him wretching in the background, instead trying to figure out how to stop you from dying. You were right there in front of them. You held out a hand and a shimmering purple shield exploded in front of a truck. He didn’t know why until he saw the fluffy puppy in the road. It barked and ran in a happy circle before darting the rest of the way across the street. 

For a moment, he thought maybe you avoided his vision on your own. Maybe you would have been hit by the car if not for your quick thinking. Maybe you would be okay--

Then, you dropped to your knees, hands digging frantically in your pockets, before stilling and falling to the ground. Hobbes would have cried out if he could. Mutt did it for him, screaming your name like it was him dying in the street. He was beside you in an instant, gathering you to his chest, but you were already limp.

It felt familiar, seeing someone he loved like that.

_ (Was your magic available now?) _

_ (Mage magic lasts such a long time.) _

“‘M gettin’ ‘er to the hospital! Bring them!” Mutt ordered someone, then he was gone and you were too. The Dread and the vision both faded and Papyrus-- …

…..

….

…

..

.

_ What happened? _

Papyrus felt fuzzy. What was he thinking about? He felt uneasy, like something happened, but he couldn’t quite place it. He looked over at Sans and saw that his skull was pale and his eye lights were tiny. Something bad was definitely happening. He reached for his magic, ready to fight the threat.

Someone grabbed him and pulled him into an impossibly dark place. He flailed, fought,  _ he was a royal guardsman, he would not be defeated, he would not he-- _

And then he was on tiled floor and his brother had hold of his wrists. False calm flooded his soul, forced through the connection by Sans. “S’okay,” Sans tells him soothingly. “Yer ok.”

Papyrus didn’t think he was, but he couldn't remember why. All he knew is that he felt… crushed. He felt… broken.

He felt… hungry.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Keep in mind that Hobbes, who is definitely dealing with a traumatic brain injury (despite not having a brain) isn't a totally reliable narrator.


	3. ... Sin

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Ignorance is not innocence, but sin."   
> -F. Robert Browning
> 
> Sans was having a perfectly nice, normal workday ten minutes ago.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter heavily references several other works in this series, including my Weirdtober fic, A New Home in New New Home, and Day Five.
> 
> There are a lot of Hard Topics in this chapter, including (TW): LV flare up, being in a hospital, potentially fatal injury, description of blood, description of soul wounds, PTSD-like flashback, mentions of medical experimentation, brief mention of suicidal ideation
> 
> I think that's it, but if I missed something, please let me know! I will summarize this one at the end.

Sans could admit that he was tired, but it was the good kind of tired. He was finally,  _ finally _ back at his desk, finally getting back to normal. When he first started back to work, every monster he met on the way into the Embassy stopped him to ask how he was, no how was he  _ really, _ but the interest was waning. Thomas had a coffee waiting for him when he arrived that morning and the dog monster hadn’t interrupted his work once since then. He was working busily at the stack of his files that Edge so kindly left him and he felt incredible, even if he still had to wear the ridiculous glasses and take frequent breaks. True, he could have done without being woken with a nightmare, but that was a small price to pay for you in his bed. Honestly, he didn’t think that you even remembered that you’d had one; it didn’t seem to affect you this morning like they sometimes did and you’d fallen back asleep almost immediately.

He just wished you would tell him why you kept having the nightmares.

His door opened without a knock and Edge and Red walked in. Sans glanced up from his computer and froze. Their faces were grim. Something was wrong, very wrong. “What is it?” he asked, perhaps a little snappier than he would have preferred.

“Your brother called,” Edge said slowly.

“Is he alright?” Sans was already standing up from his desk, already mentally prioritizing what files he needed to press into Edge’s hands before he left.

“Mutt’s fine,” Red said.

There was a long pause. “Then why are we so somber?” Sans asked. “If Mutt’s fine then who else--”

He cut himself off. It could be anyone in their family, of course, but Edge and Red wouldn’t be so hesitant to say it if it was one of the other skeletons. They would just tell him and they’d deal with it, just like they always did. No, this was someone that was of special concern to Sans and, if it wasn’t Mutt, there was only one person it could be.

“Eleanor.” It wasn’t a question. “What happened? Is she…” he trailed off and involuntarily pictured the bodies of the mages that fell into the Underground, the ones that the Queen made him remove from her throne room while she rode her new LV.

“She’s at the hospital,” Edge said quickly. “Mutt’s there with her. She collapsed at the shelter.”

“Oh.”

Red said, “I’m gonna give you two a lift.”

“No, my car is here. I can just drive--”

Edge put his hand on Sans’s shoulder, which sent a cold chill down his spine. “You want to teleport, Black.”

That doused Sans’s soul in ice water. He pressed the call button on his phone. “Thomas, I’m leaving for the day. Possibly tomorrow, too? Can you--”

“It’s taken care of, sir,” Thomas said quickly. “Go. I have this covered.”

“Thank you.” Sans hung up the phone like it was his last cigarette before the firing squad. Red stepped forward and grabbed his arm, then Sans felt the familiar grasp of the void.

Then they were in the lobby of the hospital.

Mutt and Mars were sitting in two of the chairs, Mutt’s leg bouncing and Mars staring into space. They each had a cup of coffee in their hands but neither seemed to be drinking it. Neo and Hobbes were also there, both looking grim. Hobbes had his Rubix cube, the same one he'd had at breakfast (was that only this morning?) and Neo was simply staring at the floor like it held the answers of the universe. Papyrus paced and wrung his hands, never taking his eyes off the double doors that led to the Monster Emergency Room. 

Mutt jumped to his feet the second that Sans appeared and rushed to him. “Bro! They took her to the back! Anne and Jupiter went back there too, but they haven’t come out.”

“What happened?” Sans managed.

“She used a shield and then just passed out.”

“And what are the doctors saying?”

Mutt shook his head. “Nothin’. They haven’ told us nothin’ yet.”

“Her HP was real low,” Mars said. He wasn’t looking at Sans. “In the decimals.”

Sans felt sick. “Decimals? Why? How did she get hurt? She wasn’t even doing anything dangerous! How--”

He trailed off when Alphys bustled in through the front door and rushed to the front desk. “I-I’ve been called in to c-consult on a case,” she told the receptionist. “Dr. Alphys, Royal Scientist.”

“Alphys?” Sans asked.

She looked around wildly before her eyes landed on him. “S-Sans! It’s her soul. T-the injuries. She didn’t use the injection, I guess, maybe took the ring off too fast, I'm not sure. I’m h-h-here to help stabilize her!”

It was like she was speaking a different language. “I have no idea what you’re talking about,” he said.

She frowned. “S-she didn’t tell you? She said she told you.” The door that led further into the hospital opened and a monster in scrubs waved to Alphys. “I’ll explain later. T-t-they n-need me now.” She rushed through the doors and deeper into the hospital, taking her answers with her.

“Bro--”

“Did you know?” Sans asked, his voice all quiet fury.

“What?”

“Whatever Alphys is talking about? Did you know?”

Mutt’s sockets were huge. “No! Of course not!” 

Sans nodded after he judged his brother to be telling the truth. He looked past him to Mars. “You?”

Mars laughed. “Ya think she’s tellin’ me anythin’ she didn’ tell you or Mutt? Try askin’ the super spy.” Hobbes and Neo both shook their heads, too. Edge and Red both stiffened behind him.

Oh, he would try asking the super spy. He would ask everyone. If he found out that any of them knew that you were sick and didn’t tell him… Well. It had been a while since he carried out some good old fashioned Swapfell justice. He let Mutt lead him over to the chairs and sat down to wait. You were going to be fine, he was sure of it, you had to be, and when you woke up? He was going to kill you.

***

They sat in the lobby for exactly seven minutes before an announcement blared over the loudspeaker. “Code blue in the MER,” a cool, detached voice said. “Code blue in the MER.”

“Ain’t that where we are?” Red asked.

Papyrus stopped pacing long enough to look over at Red, horror dawning on his face. “I’m sure it’s perfectly fine! There have to be other patients in the Monster Emergency Room!”

“What is a code blue?” Sans asked. His voice sounded like it was coming from so far away.

“Um,” Papyrus said.

“Just tell me.” 

Papyrus twisted his hands so much that it was probably painful, but Sans barely even noticed. “It means that someone has… is… that their heartbeat has stopped. That they’re… dead. It’s a call for everyone to come help try to get them back.”

As if on cue, the double doors that Alphys disappeared into opened and Anne and Jupiter staggered out. Both were in tears. Mars appeared next to his brother and was pulled into a bone-crushing hug. “She coded,” Anne managed. “I thought we got her stable enough but her soul started bleeding magic again and…” She trailed off and looked down at her hands. They were covered in purplish-pink liquid. Your blood.

Papyrus made a concerned squawking noise and pulled her into a hug that she didn't return.

“I’m sorry,” she said, making eye contact with Sans. “I didn’t know how bad it was.”

Sans felt his soul flare with anger, his LV screaming that _ you lied, Anne lied, who else, who else was lying to him, who-- _

No. If you were truly dying right now, his last thoughts while you live would not be ones of anger-fueled LV. There would be plenty of time for that later. “Will they get her back?” he heard himself ask.

“I don’t know,” she admitted.

“They will,” Jupiter said. “She has survived far lower odds and she will survive these.”

“Bro, come sit,” Mutt begged. He grabbed Sans’s arm and pulled him back to the chairs. Sans hadn’t even realized that he left his seat. When did he walk over to the door? When did he get so close to Anne? He let Mutt guide him to a seat and pull him down. Hands were on his shoulders, his arms, caging him in with hugs of comfort. On threat of torture he couldn’t have said who was touching him, what anyone was saying to him. Everything felt fuzzy and distant, like the world around him paused while he waited to hear whether or not you were really and truly gone.

Ten minutes ago he was at his desk, thrilled at the prospect of doing paperwork. Ten fucking minutes and everything was burning down around him.

He couldn’t say how long they waited to hear something; it could have been minutes or hours. He wasn’t sure he breathed the entire time, too afraid of what he might do or say. He was a skeleton monster, so breathing was mostly unnecessary anyway, not like mages and humans who can’t stop breathing or they--

The doors opened and Sans was on his feet again. A harried-looking young mage emerged. His white coat was stained with pink. “Mr. Serif?” he asked.

“That is me.”

“I have some news.” He gestured for Sans to follow him and Sans did. He didn’t pay any attention to whether anyone else followed or not. The doctor led him to a small room with plush chairs and fake plants. There was a medium-sized television on the wall. It looked like a funeral home from the human movies.

Sans sat down, which is when he realized that the two chairs beside him were also occupied. He glanced around and saw that Edge was on one side of him and his brother was on the other. Mutt resolutely gripped the edge of Sans’s jacket under the table. Sans couldn’t feel much at the time, but a tiny drop of gratefulness that they were there dripped from his soul.

“First of all, your girlfriend’s condition is serious--”

“Is she alive?”

The doctor looked taken aback. “Y-yes. She coded, which means that her heart stopped, but we were able to revive her.”

Sans felt cold relief drown his soul. Whatever else the doctor had to say, the two of you could deal with. You were alive. You were alive. You were--

“Unfortunately, her soul is badly damaged.” The doctor placed a scan in front of Sans. It was a soul in black and white, with two circles on it. “This is the scan Dr. Alphys did of her soul. Those circles indicate two small punctures in the soul.”

“How did this happen?” Sans asked, staring at the picture. He had only ever seen damage like that once before… He glanced sidelong at his brother.

“Dr. Alphys indicated that there had been severe trauma due to a simulation and experiment. She seemed to think that the stress and determination extractions may explain this.”

“You do not, however,” Edge said.

The doctor sighed. “I certainly would not argue with the royal scientist, but no, I do not think so. I have seen many soul injections and none of them ever caused this type of damage.”

“What do you think caused it?” Sans asked.

The doctor shook his head. “I could not say. Anyway, that scan was taken three months ago. This one--” the man stopped and handed them a second picture “--was taken when Eleanor was brought in.”

Sans thought that the first picture was bad, but it was nothing compared to this new scan. Those two small holes expanded, ripping holes the length of a phalange into your soul. They met at the top of the soul, nearly tearing the whole thing in half. Sans thought he might throw up.

“Dr. Alphys said that these tears are new,” the doctor continued. “It appears that she overflooded her system with magic and it caused the areas weakened by the wounds to burst.”

Sans stared at the picture. “How is she still alive?” he whispered.

“T-that’s where I come in.” He looked up and realized that Alphys had entered the room at some point during the conversation. He hadn’t even noticed. She was ringing her hands just like Papyrus, her expression tired but determined. “I k-knew the damage was bad, but I had no idea! But! I bought us time to figure out a t-t-treatment plan!”

“How?” Edge asked. Mutt’s hand tightened on Sans’s jacket.

“You r-r-remember the mechanism we used to s-s-store souls in the Underground.”

“Obviously.”

“W-when she c-c-c-c-coded, I extracted her soul and stored it in one of the l-leftover j-jars.” The room fell silent, oppressively so, before Alphys continued. “It will keep the soul from deteriorating while we find a t-t-t-treatement p-p-plan.”

Your soul was in a gods damned jar. “How is this different than the human children?” Edge asked. “Won’t her… body… decompose?”

“N-no!” Alphys exclaimed, aghast. “She’s not d-d-dead! The soul is next to her; it’s just as if it was pulled out for a b-b-battle or b-bond.”

“Is she awake? Does she know that her soul is just out like that?” Sans asked.

“N-no. Her soul is simply held in s-s-stasis. It’s keeping it from deteriorating further.”

Sans looked helplessly at Edge. Every fiber of his soul screamed that this was wrong, that pulling out your soul and storing it in a fucking jar was the wrong answer, but he couldn’t think clearly. His usually quick mind was bogged down with terror and adrenaline. He couldn’t think right now, couldn’t process or decide what to do.

Gods, he was letting you down.

But Edge was there, his mind as cold and calculating as ever. “You think that this is the best course of action? You removed her incredibly fragile and damaged soul and placed it in a storage container, when someone taking out her soul against her will is what caused all of this damage in the first place?” he asked archly.

Alphys blanched. She looked down at her feet, but her fear was quickly replaced with determination. “It was the on-n-nly option. It was t-t-t-this or let her d-d-die.”

“How long have you known about this injury?” Sans asked softly. Alphys tensed. “How long?” he repeated, a little harsher this time.

“T-t-three months. S-s-she came to me r-r-right around G-Gyftmas. I t-t-thought she told you!” she wailed.

Sans couldn’t tear his eye lights from the pictures in front of him. Three months. Three fucking months. You kept this from him for three fucking months. Why? Why the hell would you do that? Did you not trust him? Is this why you were having nightmares? If you hadn’t nearly died today, would you have ever told him? 

He remembered you beaming at him at breakfast, kissing him, sleeping in his bed… All while you knew your soul was injured. You were worried enough about it to go see Alphys. You knew it was a big deal. But you didn’t tell him. 

His LV roiled and he only realized that he snapped the arm of his chair in half when Mutt made a worried noise and tugged on his arm. 

Were you ever going to tell him?

Were you?  _ Were you? _

“--the plan now?” Edge was asking when Sans checked back in.

“We have to find a way to heal the damage,” the doctor said. “The damage is severe enough that it is unlikely that it will heal on its own.”

“I’m working around the clock on a solution,” Alphys said. “W-we’ll find one.”

A few more pieces of information were exchanged, Edge asked more questions, but Sans didn’t hear any of it. He couldn’t move, couldn’t breathe, his LV screaming at him to make you pay, make you all pay. 

“Sans!”

He looked up and realized that Edge was leaned over him and he said his name like he’d said it several times. “Your LV?” he asked, not unkindly.

“Wouldn’t yours?” Sans snarled. “She lied to me! For months! What am I supposed to do? How can I be okay with this?”

“Bro--”

“No! She’s a damned liar!” Sans yelled. Mutt fell silent and somewhere under the LV, Sans cringed.

“The doctor said that we could go see Ellie when we were ready,” Edge said slowly. “You need to calm down before you do so. I will stand guard until you are more able.”

Some part of Sans knew that Edge was right, but his soul felt like it was being shoved through a garbage disposal. Everything was raw and hot and fury tore through his bones. “You do that,” he snarled. “I don’t know that I will ever want to see that liar again.”

Edge placed his hand on Sans’s shoulder as he walked out of the room. Sans could feel Mutt hovering near the door. “Get out,” he said simply. “Go with Edge.”

“Bro-”

“Get. Out.”

“O-ok, bro,” Mutt said carefully. So painfully carefully, like they were still Underground and anything his little brother said might set him off. Mutt hadn’t sounded like that, not in a long time.

Sans looked at his baby brother helplessly. He wanted to tell him that he was sorry for yelling, sorry for his LV, sorry for Mutt’s LV and their mother and…

And that Mutt’s best friend might be dying because you were too  ~~ selfish ~~ scared to tell him about your soul.

He didn’t say any of it, all of the words and feelings and fear tangled in his throat. His baby brother slipped out of the room and shut the door.

Sans buried his face in his hands and tried to get his breathing under control. He had more control than this, lashing out at you, at Edge, at Mutt. He was better than this. He  _ had _ to be better than this.

“Wow, you really are a drama queen, aintcha?”

Only the fact that the voice sounded so much like Comic kept Sans from unleashing a bone attack in the direction of the unexpected talking. He looked up, the taste of an aborted attack burning in his throat. The television had somehow flicked on and Comic was on the screen.

Well, not Comic. A version of Comic.

He was sitting at a desk or table of his own, a cup of coffee at his elbow. He wore a lab coat and glasses and his emerald eye lights looked bored as he looked over some sort of readout to the side of the screen. Sans couldn’t see it directly; the only evidence of it was the reflection in the monster’s glasses and the way his eye lights flicked up and down as if reading. It took Sans longer than it should have to realize who he was looking at. He was going to blame it on his LV that he didn’t immediately recognize the AI version of himself on the screen.

“AI Sans?” he asked warily.

“Swapfell Sans,” he said back mildly.

“I thought you didn’t want to see any of us ever again.”

The AI laughed. “I don’t. Didn’t. But… Well, someone has to keep an eye on you chucklefucks. Your Nora going to the hospital pinged me and I decided to pop in and see what was happening. Her chart looks… sheesh.”

“If you’re not here to help, please leave.”

“Touchy. Luckily for you, I am here to help, chuckles. See, I just saw your little slow mo breakdown and thought I’d help you out.” The AI waved his hand and a window opened up on the other side of the TV. “This is the simulation that your girl went through with that doctor. I think you might find it… enlightening.”

Sans stared for a few seconds before shaking his head. “She doesn’t want me to see.”

The AI shrugged. “She probably doesn’t want your LV deciding to rip ‘er apart either.” His stare softened a little. “Look. I get privacy or what the hell ever hangups you organics have, but the truth is you need to see this, man. It makes it pretty clear why your girl might’ve been afraid to tell you about her soul.”

Sans narrowed his sockets at his doppelganger. “And why do you suddenly give a shit about Eleanor?”

The AI unexpectedly blushed a little green at the question. His eye lights darted away and he huffed a sigh. “Fine. My version’s grown on me, okay? I… we… we’ve got a little bit of a reverse harem situation going on over here. Everyone’s into Cookie and… I dunno, she was worried about your version and I just… I want every version of her to be safe and happy, okay?!”

“Reverse harem?”

“That’s your takeaway?” the AI snarked. “Yeah, it’s… Listen, just ask your Alphys. It’ll make her fucking day.”

“Isn’t your version of me with her?”

A snort. “Hon, you’re lucky to have your version locked down. Ours is a little… less committed. She’s kind of playing the field.” He kicked his feet up on the table, revealing that he didn’t wear slippers but rather fuzzy socks with cartoon mice on them. “‘Course, that works out just fine for the rest of us.”

“And… what? All of the Sanses are after her?” Sans asked despite himself. It meant nothing to him, not really, but the whole situation was fascinating, like watching a trainwreck.

“Not just the Sanses.”

“Fuck,” Sans said with feeling.

“Yep. So anyway… You gonna watch this video so you don’t make this whole really bad situation a fuckton worse?”

Sans nodded at the AI, who just grinned back. The video started playing and Sans settled in, hoping that he wasn’t making a mistake.

***

_ Papyrus couldn’t sleep.  _

_ The new house was lovely. He and Sans shared a bedroom, which was good. Safe. His brother could see him and he, his brother at all times. Physical closeness meant it was easier to share magic, too, so neither of them got as tired. Papyrus had less Hurt Days and Sans had less Sad Days and that was more than he could have hoped. _

_ But it smelled like human. It didn’t matter that it was the lovely human that made him cookies; his instincts didn’t know that he didn’t want to kill that human, that he didn’t need your soul up here where magic and food were plentiful. It didn’t matter that he would rather lose his hands than hurt you. His instincts wouldn’t let him sleep when all that magic was just floating around him, leaking out of you. _

_ Maybe that’s why he decided to get some water and a snack, letting the Gyftmas lights guide his quiet descent down the stairs from their room. Black said he was allowed to have any food any time so he shouldn’t get in trouble. It was safe, he was safe. Safesafesafesafesafe. He opened the cold box and practiced breathing how Dr. Springer taught him. Black never lied. He didn’t get mad any time he saw Papyrus eat. This was fine. He picked out an apple and shakily grabbed a knife to cut it. This was okay. Knives weren’t bad, only what you did with them. And he wasn’t bad; he was surviving. This was an apple, not a hu-- _

_ The smell of human overwhelmed him as the door behind him swung open. _

_ His brain broke and his instincts took over. You said something to him--something mundane and uninteresting, something unworthy of the Great and Terrible Papyrus. He flipped his grip on the knife and turned your soul blue. You grunted in surprise and tried to ask what he was doing, but the knife was against your throat and the blue magic was choking you enough that you couldn’t speak. _

_ Humans were so fucking annoying when they spoke. _

_ Papyrus used his non-knife hand to summon your soul. The little pink-ish purple heart floated in front of him and his eye lights flared. A mage? Mage magic lasted so much longer than the feeble magic in a human soul! You would feed him and his brother for months! He would have smiled if he still could. _

_ Slowly, delicately, he pulled the soul closer. He and Sans learned a long time ago that souls were fragile little things; any rough handling at all could injure or destroy them, and wasting good food was a crime here in the Underground. No, they’d use every part of your meat, just like they did with every human and mage that fell down here, not that that really mattered to him. He couldn’t exactly eat normal food any more. _

_ No, he already had what he needed. _

_ He drew the soul to his mouth and ignored your frantic gasps. Your soul sped up in his hands and he rolled his eye lights. They always did that. Very carefully so that he didn’t inadvertently pop the thing, he pressed his two canines into the fragile balloon and was rewarded with refreshing magic pouring straight onto his tongue. He hummed in pleasure; it had been a long time since he had such a delectable soul. He needed to be careful, of course, for a myriad of reasons: If he popped your soul, it would dust and take your magic with it, wasting months of magic he could feed on (and share with his brother through the soul bond). Additionally, feeding on souls was a soul crime, and soul crimes were punishable by death. They were the worst thing a monster could do. _

_ Papyrus used to give a shit that he was a bad monster.  _

_ To his irritation, he realized that you were screaming,  _ screaming _ , and why was your voice familiar? Who the hell were you? Had the two of you met? What…? _

_ Later, much later, he would distantly realize that Dr. Springer would want to know what he was thinking and feeling when he grabbed you and tried to drive the knife into your chest. He would try to put it into signs that he knew, but it was too complicated and his skull was fuzzy. He remembered being hungry, feeling trapped, being scared. He remembered needing your magic, fearing he’d dust or his brother would dust from trying to keep him from dusting if he didn’t get it.  _

_ When his skull stopped being fuzzy, a blaster like his brother's but not like his bother's hovered in his face. _

_ "Sans! Stop! Please!" you screamed. _

_ Black grabbed you hard enough to bruise and threw you against the wall. Your head hit and you fell to the ground, kneeling on all fours with blood running down your face. You were shaking. Papyrus turned to face the blaster, his death, and he wasn't afraid or sad. This was for the best. He wouldn't be such a burden on his brother anymore. This was for the best. This-- _

_ The blaster didn't fire, despite its whirring. Before it could, Black screamed. He grabbed his face as the thin crack over his eye widened and spread. Marrow leaked from the wound. _

_ Papyrus's brain went fuzzy again at the sight. _

_ Then you were kneeling next to a crumpled body on the floor. There was blood, your blood, on your face and Mutt was standing between him and you. Marrow was leaking through Mutt’s shirt and he was breathing hard, one eye light bright with magic. Sans appeared next to Mutt, his eye glowing much dimmer than Mutt’s, but also breathing heavily. _

_ “What the ‘ell ‘appened?” Sans demanded, looking from Black to Papyrus. Papyrus tried to shrink, to melt, to disappear. He’d ruined everything. _

_ “It’s my fault,” you said softly and Papyrus nearly snapped his head off his neck spinning it to look at you. “I… I spooked him in the kitchen. I didn’t mean to; I was half asleep and I forgot. I screamed and Sans…” You swallowed hard like you were trying not to cry. “Sans’s LV sort of took over. He…” Your hand ghosted to the bloody cut on your face and your eyes cut to Mutt, then you continued, “Mutt stopped him.” You looked up at Papyrus and he was surprised to see tears, not hate or anger or fear or-- “I’m so sorry. I… I didn’t mean to, Papyrus. I’m sorry.” You looked back down at Sans and scrubbed at your eyes. “Mutt, I’m sorry.” _

_ “He’ll be fine,” Mutt said firmly. “Didn’ even touch his HP. Probably just a concussion. Let’s get ‘im to the couch an’ call in a healer an’ he’ll be fine.” He turned to Papyrus now and somehow he didn’t look angry either. “You ok?” _

_ “‘E’s fine, no thanks to your mage bitch,” Sans growled. Mutt’s eye flashed a warning and Papyrus was scared. _

Don’t call her that! _ Papyrus signed to his brother desperately. _

_ “Why the hell not? You know what they did to us! This… this’s all their fault! How do ya think that damn flower got ‘is magic? It’s their fault you’re--” Sans snapped his jaw shut before he said anything else, but Papyrus knew. Broken. That’s what Sans was going to say. Broken. And he was, and now he broke their new home. _

_ Maybe if he begged, Sans could stay here where it was safe. _

_ “Why don’ ya go upstairs while we get Sans taken care of?” Mutt asked coolly. “We can talk after that.” _

_ Papyrus did what he did best: he ran away. He heard you say you were sorry again, heard Sans sneer at you, heard his own labored breathing and crying as he collapsed onto the bed in their room, the room they wouldn’t have much longer. Because he was broken. _

_ Brokenbrokenbrokenbrokenbrokenbrok-- _

“Paps? Bro? Wake up!”

Papyrus didn’t know what day it was.

Or where he was.

Or why he felt so shaky, like his magic was being stretched thin. He tried to call out to Sans, but he couldn’t talk, his mouth wouldn’t move, what…?

“Ya’re fine, bro,” Sans said. “Ya’re fine. Just use Hands.” 

That’s right. Papyrus spoke in hands now.  _ What happened? _

Sans sighed. “Ya had a bad dream, bro. Yer ok. We’re at the hospital, waitin’ ta see if Ella's ok.”

Papyrus looked around and blinked as he recognized his face and his brother’s faces on the monsters standing around them. Slowly, he remembered that you were hurt, that Mutt said your soul was damaged.

Your soul was damaged.

He looked at Sans in horror. His brother felt the spike of anxiety but didn’t seem to know why as he looked his brother over. 

How could he forget? He was the one who hurt you. He hurt your soul, bit into it with his two sharp fangs, sucked your magic from it. He tried to kill you by devouring the very essence of what made you you. He committed a soul crime and you were dying because of it.

If they knew, they would kill him. And he would deserve it. The realization brought nothing but horror and grim resolve. It was time to be honest, while he still remembered the truth.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter Summary:
> 
> Red and Edge tell Sans that Ellie is in the hospital and teleport him there. While in they're in the waiting room, Ellie codes and would have died if Alphys had not removed her soul and stored it in one of the jars they used to store the souls underground. It will keep her soul from deteriorating while they search for a way to heal the severe damage she caused to her soul when she removed the ring too quickly to save the puppy. Sans finds out that Ellie knew she had a soul injury and did not tell him for three months, causing his LV to flare up. The AI Sans we met in Day Five shows up and insists that Sans watch the video from Dr. Hueline's simulation to help him understand why Ellie might hide her soul trauma. He also mentions they have a bit of a reverse harem going on in the digital world, because that's a fun little fan fic Easter egg that made me laugh.  
> The chapter ends with Hobbes dreaming about the night that he injured Ellie in the kitchen. His dream reveals that he and Neo used to not only eat the flesh of humans, but drain their souls directly (basically eating the soul) which is considered the worst thing a monster can do and is punishable by death. He also reveals that he and Neo have some sort of soul connection and that he cannot eat in the traditional way anymore. He remembers that he caused the damage to Ellie's soul by trying to eat it, as well as Sans's LV-induced rage that led him to injure both Ellie and Mutt. When he wakes up, he resolves to tell the truth, even though it will result in his execution.


End file.
